I am Ian Kretz, or Ian Tacular, or Rainbow Man, or Human. Who I am is just a combination of my labels. What I have decided to call myself. I am told I am everything. That when I close my eyes, my everything becomes nothing. Yet I can still dream, and I can still think. I can still feel and I am aware of the things around me. When someone opens the door and they shout at me, I wake up. Who did the shouting, well it was someone in my world. So yes when I close my eyes I close my objective eyes and open my subjective eyes. My imagination, and what I feel never changes, although what they feel does. My senses, and how I think about them change all the time. A feeling is a physical connection with another object with sight, sound, smell, touch, or a combination of all of them. Yes a feeling can describe how I feel, but are they not more likely to be put with thoughts? A feeling is a base, and the thoughts are what you build with.
I am everything, and yet this makes me nothing? That is the goal I am trying prove. Yet when I think of nothing I expand on it. I must make sure that I actually am everything. Yes I understand that I make up who I think I am by my feelings and then building thoughts on them. Perhaps one can only know feelings, and thoughts are all just a trick of the fae. Yet it is a thought to think that we are everything. Possibly the largest assumption one can make. Every other assumption about life would dwarf in comparison to this assumption. So this thought I am everything. If I follow this thought then I am me, I am my ego, I am every feeling, I ame every thought, I am everyone that ever existed, I am every metaphor ever made, I am every lie ever told, I am every building ever made, and every mountain ever formed, and I am nothing. The nothingness inside, and the nothingness outside. I am everything, and nothing. If I am nothing and build upwards then I can make anything in my imagination. I can choose and mold my life around me, but there are many things outside of my control. The more I fight it the more it will fight back.
So what is the proper answer to the question how are you doing? Everything in every possible way and nothing all at the same time. For to be everything you must also be nothing.
What is it to forgive well its simple once you understand the concept above. I am forgiveness, and I am nothingness. I am love, and I am nothingness. I am truth, and I am nothingness. I am every emotion and I am no emotion.
To understand everything I must understand nothing aswell. However just because I understand nothing does not mean I understand everything. Sure I can assume I understand everything but that is an assumption. Life is still a quest for knowledge, but I can start by understanding nothing. With nothing as my base I can build what ever I want. Every material every thought can be shaped by nothing and then become everything. But how does this shaping take place? Well if I am at nothing and at this state of nothing I become a brick and then a tower and then a world and then a universe. It is still all nothing for nothing was given to make this.
Although I live in a world where I do have stuff, and other people can take it of give me more. I live in a unvierse of stuff all made from the same one thing. This one thing is somones nothing. Is all nothing the same? Yet I am me, and I am made from this one thing. So is everything else, I am not nothing in this world I am one thing. Layers upon layers upon layers of nothing. Like oil on water. Different coloured oil, and oil. Yet they are both nothing, and the water and the liquid is all nothing. Well what is this one thing, and science has given it many labels still it is one thing. It is nothing, our shared nothing. Is this the one thing that needs to be destroyed. Yet we cannot destroy nothing for it is nothing. We could give it another name, and change it but it is nothing. If this thing were to be oblitered so to would everything else. I can only destroy and create what is in my imgination. So by this logic we are all part of some larger creatures imgination. We are that creature's dreams or nothingness, just like in my dreams everyone is me. I do not want to destroy myself, and thus I do not want to destroy the creature from which I am created from this creatures nothingness.
If I were to try and destroy the creature that created me it would fight back. Much like inception, and how the more you fight it the more it will fight you. Jesus for example he tried to fight this creature and ended up dying for his thoughts and actions. He did what he was suppose to do and romans did what they were suppose to do. Still not knowing what they were and they were all one. They still did what was suppose to happen. As the future constantly changes and the past is always a lie, as one cannot truly know if they thoughts they have are real or made up. The present moment in which you make a choice is the only thing that matters. I do what I am told but not from an external foruce It is from a force within. Still I am confusing this with peer presure, with knowledge of other people. If someone has studied their whole life in medicine would you want to follow their advice. Well I would untill I can have enough self-proof that that what they are saying is more of a guess and is effecting my in a negative way. Then the only option would be to find an alternate rout with the same outcome. Healthy body, and a healthy mind. I do what I am suppose to do, just like I am doing what I am suppose to do by writing this right now.
No comments:
Post a Comment